Бесплатный фрагмент - How to Start Speaking Even if You’ve Forgotten Everything

Preface

«I’ve been learning English for years! I might even know tenses better than some native speakers. But when it comes to saying just one word in real life — I freeze…»

If I had a dollar every time I heard this phrase during my lessons… I’d still write this book. Because the fear of speaking doesn’t care whether you work in a grocery store or run a multi-million-dollar company.

Xenoglossophobia (a.k.a. language anxiety) has ruined more self-esteems than those awful fitting room mirrors with cheap lighting that accentuate every annoying flaw we just can’t seem to get rid of.

The same thing happens during conversations. Especially with someone we don’t know. Especially in a foreign language.

But here’s the catch: most of the time, the problem isn’t even a lack of proper knowledge. The problem is how your brain works when you find yourself in a stressful situation.

The human brain is an incredibly complex thing — perhaps its secrets will never be fully uncovered. Still, to figure out the issue that bothers us, we don’t need to run to an MRI scan or pay for a year-long subscription to a therapist. Because the answers to our questions lie right on the surface.

So, let’s figure out what really makes us stay silent.

Why Do We Stay Silent?

1. Fear of Mistakes (Perfectionism)

The core idea: We’re afraid of looking stupid, making a mistake, and losing face.

Do you remember how in school, a teacher would say in front of the whole class: «Wrong!» or announce your grade for that test you hadn’t prepared for — and you’d blush? I think many of us know that feeling. I still have nightmares about standing at the blackboard in algebra class…

So, that fear gets ingrained in us.

In adulthood, it becomes even stronger: we’re successful people, we can’t make mistakes! Thus, an inner critic kicks in: «Don’t speak until you’re 100% sure.»